It has truly been a season like no other. After the first-ever winter World Cup in Qatar split the club campaign in two, we’re finally crawling towards a June finish line.
At times, it’s been one hard slog for players, managers and fans alike so we should be grateful for a few rib-tickling moments of levity to break up the intensity.
Inspired by a thread this week on cult Twitter account, The Upshot, we’ve compiled 10 of the weirdest and wackiest moments of the season.
From Salt Bae pretending he was part of Argentina’s World Cup winners and allegations of witchcraft within the Pogba family to the BBC porn prank and Keith Curle feeling in a ‘sexy mood’, it’s been a bizarre one.
Salt and Sheikhs
Lionel Messi completed football when he inspired Argentina to World Cup glory in Qatar and what a moment it must have been as he finally got his hands on the one trophy he craved above all others.
What Messi didn’t expect – or remotely want – was to be harassed during the celebrations by a supple-wristed Turkish chef who doesn’t know his place.
Turkish chef Salt Bae somehow found himself in the thick of Argentina’s World Cup party
He also put a World Cup winners’ gold medal in his mouth after the Albiceleste triumphed
Salt Bae – real name Nusret Gokce – somehow managed to get onto the pitch in the best interests of making Argentina’s triumph all about himself.
He was inexplicably allowed to hold and kiss the famous trophy and was even seen biting into one of the player’s medals.
But the most cringeworthy moment came when he repeatedly pestered Messi, pulling him back by the shoulder until the star realised a quick handshake was the only way to get rid of him.
Video showed Lionel Messi (second left) avoiding Salt Bae (grey suit) in an awkward exchange during Argentina’s World Cup celebrations in Qatar
After the captain looked back, obviously bemused, the Turk tried to pull his shoulder for a second time
Eventually, Messi did agree to a handshake and a picture with the Turkish chef
‘I only popped out to get a couple of beers…’
We’ve all done it. Walking along to the local off licence to pick up some cans, just minding your own business and the next thing you’re in a £460million palace playing with a lion cub.
But that’s what happened to England fan Alex Sullivan, his dad Tommy and mate John on the very first night of their trip to Doha for the World Cup.
Everyone’s natural response was to call bulls*** when the words ‘palace and lions and everything’ was slipped casually into a live interview they did on talkSPORT.
Alex then dropped a video of himself patting one of the lion cubs and revealed of their super-rich Qatari hosts: ‘They were incredibly generous and hospitable and we had a great time.
England fan Alex Sullivan bumped into some wealthy Qataris – and their exotic animals – during his visit to the World Cup
The England fan posted a video of himself with one of the wealthy sheikh’s lion cubs
‘They had been asleep most of the day but they took us for a drive in the Lamborghini. I filmed that and also played with a lion cub.
‘He had his own personal zoo with the lion cub, various birds of prey and some monkeys. They are obviously very powerful people in business. The palace was worth about two billion Qatari Riyal [£460m].’
And that was only their first night.
BBC left red-faced by porn prank
Qatar may have been hot but that’s nothing compared to the burning red faces of the Match of the Day crew after a porn prank left them embarrassed back in January.
Gary Lineker was just introducing coverage of the Wolves vs Liverpool FA Cup replay when a symphony of sex sounds left the host and his guests completely bemused.
Lineker and Alan Shearer were left in fits of giggles as the coverage quickly cut away for a pre-match interview with Jurgen Klopp.
Gary Lineker could not hide his embarrassment at the porn noises coming from the studio
Lineker later tweeted that he had found the phone that had been making the porn noises
Daniel Jarvis later posted a picture of himself with an identical phone to the one Gary Lineker posted
It emerged the moans and groans were emanating from a mobile phone taped to the set at Molineux and the Youtube prankster Daniel Jarvis soon claimed responsibility.
Every time he called the phone, the noises started up again, as revealed on his own live stream of the prank.
‘As pranks go, it was a good one and credit to them. It was funny I thought,’ Lineker later admitted.
My Special One
When a football-loving couple appeared after one of Roma’s training sessions during their pre-season trip to Albufeira, Jose Mourinho grumpily acquiesced to a picture with them.
The coach was itching to get away but the man insisted he remain a little longer for some reason.
Taking his girlfriend’s hand tenderly, he embarked on a lengthy speech about how much he loved her as Mourinho stood awkwardly next to them.
Jose Mourinho was left awkwardly watching on as a Roma fan proposed to his girlfriend
The fans were given the opportunity to meet Mourinho at Roma’s Portuguese pre-season camp
Having met ‘The Special One’, one Roma fan found the courage to pop the question
It was only when the bloke got down on one knee to propose that it dawned on Mourinho what on earth was going on.
In the end, he couldn’t help break into a big grin as his coaching staff cheered the happy couple.
It must have been exactly how she always dreamt it.
Put a spell on you
In another of the season’s ‘you can’t make it up’ moments, Paul Pogba’s brother Mathias takes to social media to accuse the France midfielder or paying a witch doctor £3.5m to ‘neutralise’ Kylian Mbappe as he prepared to face Manchester United with PSG.
‘At the request of Paul, the witch was told to neutralise Mbappe, who back then was on a rapid rise, far outstripping Paul’s fame,’ his brother claimed.
‘It was strange to see that during that match Kylian was a shadow of himself against a reserve side.’
One of the season’s most bizarre moments came when Mathias Pogba’s social media videos (right) claiming his brother Paul (left) paid a witch doctor to ‘neutralise’ PSG and France striker Kylian Mbappe in a Champions League game against Manchester United
Mbappe was far from at his best as United left PSG stunned in the 2019 Champions League tie
Mathias went on to claim the witch doctor ended up stopping the curse because Paul hadn’t paid him enough to totally wreck Mbappe’s career. ‘The witch wanted to make him pay as much as possible.’
The African mystic was later revealed to be called The Marabout and it all became another intriguing layer of the alleged £11m blackmail plot against Pogba.
Pogba admitted to using a sorcerer to try and steer clear of injuries but he vehemently denied turning the magic powers on Mbappe.
Dike’s Dishwasher Disaster
We’ve all done stupid things – the key thing is to poke a bit of fun at yourself afterwards.
Like West Bromwich Albion striker Daryl Dike, who confessed back in August he’d been washing his clothes in dishwasher tablets for a whole year.
In a Tiktok clip captioned ‘yes, I am dumb,’ the American explained: ‘For the longest time I have thought that my washing machine is just crap.
‘But anyways when I moved into this apartment I bought one of those huge bags of laundry detergent to wash all my clothes. Recently it ran out so I went to the store to buy some more.
Footballer Daryl Dike, 22, has left fans – and his club – in hysterics as he revealed he has been using dishwasher tablets to wash his clothes for months
‘I’m looking at the bag and I can’t find the bag anywhere in the store. I’m sitting there like ‘why can’t I find it?’
‘I come back to my apartment and I look down at the bag I have.’
Holding the bag of Finish Quantum dishwasher tabs up to the camera, Dike says in disbelief: ‘This is what I’ve been using!
‘I’ve been washing my clothes in dishwasher soap since I’ve been here. I have lived in England for eight months.
‘I am an idiot! How did I even do that?’ We don’t know, Daryl.
Retiring but not shy
No footballer likes to admit they can’t perform any more and it’s time to hang up the boots.
But few have raged against the dying light quite like Barcelona legend Gerard Pique, who decided to vent all the pent-up frustrations of a distinguished two-decade career on one referee.
Pique, then 35, was named on the bench for the final game of his professional career, a league match at Osasuna back in November.
Gerard Pique informed referee Jesus Gil Manzano he was a ‘f***ing disgrace and f*** your mother’ during the rant that ended his Barcelona career in some style
The retiring defender walked out into the pitch to argue when the half-time whistle blew
He proceeded to follow the officials down the tunnel, where he was given his marching orders
Incensed that Barca were 1-0 down following Robert Lewandowski’s sending off, Pique greeted the half-time whistle by making an aggressive beeline straight to referee Jesus Gil Manzano.
It later emerged that Pique blasted the official with: ‘You are the referee that has f***ed us over the most by a distance. It’s a f***ing disgrace, f*** your mother.’
Unsurprisingly, Manzano brandished a red card in the tunnel, ending any hope Pique had of coming on for one last appearance. Hilariously, Pique was handed a four-match suspension that will never be served.
What a way to go out!
Keith Curle is in a ‘sexy mood’
Post-match manager interviews can be a tough watch most of the time. Time-worn platitudes about the team’s performance and working harder the next time.
But after watching his Hartlepool United side beat Grimsby in a crunch League Two clash back in October, Keith Curle left not only his interviewer but fans everywhere speechless.
Asked for his thought on then match, Curle replied: ‘How do I feel? I woke up this morning and had three requests.
‘For us to win, Manchester City to win and for my missus to be in a sexy mood.
Keith Curle had us all in hysterics with his brilliant comments in one post-match interview
‘I’ve got two out of three so far, so now I’ve got a two-hour drive home that I will be grafting to make sure I get a hat-trick.’
As Curle’s matter-of-fact face cracks up, the Hartlepool media staffer is at a complete loss for what to say.
Sadly Curle wasn’t in place for a great deal longer. Hartlepool fired him on February 22 when they were one point clear of the drop zone. They did, ultimately, suffer relegation to the National League.
The best thing since what??
Jack Grealish had England fans completely bemused during an interview at the World Cup.
The Manchester City star was speaking about there being an ‘overreaction’ to the Three Lions’ goalless draw with the United States after they’d steamrollered Iran in their first match.
Fans were left confused after they couldn’t work out if Jack Grealish calls England ‘best thing since sliced veg’ or the ‘best thing since sliced bread’ in his recent interview
But instead of saying England ‘were the best thing since sliced bread’ as you’d expect in relation to that Iran game, Grealish got totally the wrong supermarket aisle when he said ‘the best thing since sliced veg.’
It caused a debate on social media over what he did actually say, with some claiming it was ‘bread’ but it was somehow twisted into something else by his accent.
Sounded like ‘veg’ to us.
It’s what she would have wanted
And we can’t leave you without revisiting Ray Parlour’s ‘touching’ tribute to our late Queen.
After admitting ‘I don’t know what she liked to drink’, the ex-Arsenal and England midfielder decided Her Maj’s favourite tipple could well have been a glass of Cobra beer with a shot of Jaegermeister inside it.
Ray raising a glass to the late monarch before seeing off his patented ‘Cobra bomb’ is surely the best tribute of the lot.
Ray Parlour raises a ‘Cobra bomb’ to the late Queen in a touching tribute back in September